Do the Vikings have the safest safety?

We’re always glad to read the Forbes annual list of safest cities, especially at a time (as the local evening news would say) “…when crime is reaching the front doors of our very own homes.” And even though Minneapolis / St. Paul gets top billing (not surprisingly: being a former Minnesotan myself, I’d probably rather ski than fight), isn’t it nice to know that Chicago is the 15th safest city in America? Now, these are metropolitan areas and they’re including national disasters in their metrics and it’s not likely that we’ll be hit by a typhoon anytime soon — and let’s be glad that Forbes didn’t take the Lakefront bike path into account — if they did, we’d barely crack the top 100. Maybe it’s the Bean. After all, when I visit the Bean, I just kinda chill for a few minutes. Because that’s what the Bean doessss, mannn. It makes you chilllllll.